Sunday, April 1, 2012

Where did the time go?

I've known all along that my days here were numbered, but the past 14 weeks have FLOWN by! I think I've been in denial about leaving, but I have to face it now that I've only got 2 weeks here. In the next 2 weeks, I've got to accomplish A LOT: finish an evaluation of the employee wellness program here at H3, deal with everything school-related that I've been putting off (namely the presentation I have to make on what I've accomplished here), get ready for hooding, a beach trip & a friend's wedding, and figure out my next step on the job front.

"One can never consent to creep when one feels an impulse to soar."

I mentioned this quote in a previous post.  My mom emailed me this when I was having a really rough day and the words just spoke to me.  I don't think she realized it had such an effect on me, but these words continue to echo in my life.  I realized a few weeks ago that I don't want to go back to the upstate. I kept grinding at the job search, but neither Greenville or Spartanburg ever made it to the "location" box on any of my searches.  I think it all started with a conversation with one of the culinary interns about a possible job in New York City.  It sounded so amazing and I realized that I want that for myself -- a job that I love in a new, fun city.  Essentially, an offer I just can't refuse.  For those of you who know me well, you know this is so unlike me.  I have never been the type of person to just pick up & go.  Everything in my life requires methodical planning and change is not something I adapt to very well.  However, I've been writing about how much I've learned about life, myself, and the world as we know it, and I've come to the conclusion that it's time for me to do something new.  I'm ready for a big change.  I'm ready to see what life has to offer, where I will end up, and what kind of contribution I can make to society.  I'm ready to soar.

I've also learned a lot lately about the person I have been, the person I am, and the person I want to be.  While the idea of moving to a city where no one knows me is a bit intriguing, I've come to the conclusion that I have to know me.  I have to figure out who I am as an adult -- especially since I may not have people around who just "get me."  I don't want to be the kind of person people forget.  I want to live every day in hopes of making someone else's day.  I want to be a servant of the Lord and mankind and take happiness wherever I go.  Somehow, I've gotten so lucky lately to have people come into my life who make me want to be a better person.  Their attitude and outlook on life is so infectious.

The road ahead is quite scary, but I'm comforted by the fact that everything does happen for a reason. I've been looking for and applying to jobs in Nashville, Charlotte, and Atlanta, which is both nerve-wracking and exciting.  No bites yet, but I'm keeping and open mind and my fingers crossed.  Things may or may not work out the way I want, but I'll end up exactly where I need to be.  That's the beauty of this ride -- everything serves as a learning experience for what's to come and everything will fall into place just how it's meant to.

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